Monday, April 25, 2011

Sobriety, Emotional and Mental Disorders

Great Langdale Big Walk


Hello? -hello, hello {echoing}...

I am alive. Thank you to those who have inquired about my hiatus. Recovery is a peculiar thing. Being alcohol-free is not as free as it sounds. For me, it has cost the blissful ignorance I used to have about my true nature.

I have been coming to terms with some hard truths about myself. Some UGLY, hard truths, which I am processing through more so than ever currently. As a result, I have had to step back from blogging for a bit because I believe it is in everyone's best interest to not throw too much crap out into the world. There is enough as it is. And honestly (because it is an honest program, after all :), that is all I've had to offer lately. And ironically, because of the 12 step program, I know that only being capable of slinging crap is ok as long as it is done in a way that doesn't harm anyone, including the program, and as long as I keep using the steps as my solution.

It says in the Big Book, "there are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest." Friends, I am here to tell you that I have that capacity and therefore, I HAVE HOPE! As long as there is breath inside of me, I have hope.

And I will continue to offer my experience and strength to others. For now, however, I have not the strength to do it on this blog. I am leaning hard on those around me. They are sharing their strength with me. It IS "how it works" and it is a beautiful thing.

6 comments:

  1. You take care of yourself first, whatever that may look like.
    For some of us, writing and/or journaling is a great outlet. For others, it isn't.
    Come back if and when you feel like it.

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  2. dAAve had said it. fortify yourself first. find that inner divine spark. i found this link --
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_xrezwc4d4&feature=related -- i hope this will help add strength and fortitude as it did me. it helped me remember.

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  3. We can't help others until we are able to help ourselves. Take care of you.

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  4. Always choose self first, others second when in recovery. Your must build your defenses in the manner that is most tangible to you and for you. Sounds like your doing just that. Best of luck. Hug.Tammy

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  5. Nice informative blog, thanks for sharing.

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  6. Just checking back frim time to time.
    I’ve been following and enjoying your blog for a while now and would like to invite you to visit and perhaps follow me back. Sorry I took so long for the invitation

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Thank you for sharing!