I have missed blogging this week! Reading your inspirational posts each day, commenting and writing has become a part of my recovery program for which I am very grateful.
We spent the last few days boating and visiting with friends. Since we were kid-free, cocktails were flowing freely, except for me, of coarse. I watched these normal drinkers open their first drink on the boat around noon, stop drinking around 2:00 while eating lunch, drink more after lunch until dinnertime, at which point they switched to non-alcoholic beverages for the rest of the night. I was acutely aware of being different than my friends not because they drank and I didn't but rather because of HOW they drank vs. HOW I used to drink.
For example, if I was still drinking, I would have started around noon whether the kids were present or not and I wouldn't have stopped until I passed out that night. It still baffles me to watch people drink enough alcohol to get that peaceful, easy feeling and then to just stop and lose that peaceful, easy feeling.
Oh, wait... I often forget that this is what happens to alcoholics like me.
My friends don't lose that peaceful, easy feeling when they stop drinking.
I did.
In fact, they don't need to drink in the first place to get those feelings.
I did.
At this point in my sobriety, I am not tempted or bothered by other people drinking around me. I have no desire to drink, thanks to the grace of God. I also took my program with me -- got on my knees each morning to pray, read my meditation books, and knew that my sponsor and any number of other women were merely a phone call away.
Most importantly, I made frequent conscious contact with my Higher Power, which gives me that peaceful, easy feeling like no other I have ever known.
Looking forward to catching up on your blogs this week.
I was one of those who would have one beer and that was okay and enough. Alcohol holds no magic for me. I am lucky.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, makes me sigh serenely :) YAY GOD!
ReplyDeleteGlad you had some time away. I too no longer have the urge to drink. I also notice how differntly I drank from other people. There just wasn't enough for me, and I sure didn't know when to stop. But now I watch and listen and learn. I don't judge other people's drinking either,and like you I just am so grateful I no longer have to be the "life of the party". Great post!
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